Thank you, dear friends, for the words of encouragement and support you have given me both here on this blog and on my Facebook page.  What a blessing you are!  I understand what Paul meant when he told the Philippians, “Every time I think of you, I give thanks to my God. ⁴ Whenever I pray, I make my requests for all of you with joy, ⁵ for you have been my partners in spreading the Good News about Christ from the time you first heard it until now. ⁶ And I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns.”  Philippians 1:3-6 NLT

The idea of writing a blog or a book has always been overwhelming, but you have sent notes of encouragement and testimonies of how God has and is working in your own lives!  Thank you! It is my prayer that you will continue to share the Good News of Jesus Christ and his miracles with others.

When I ended my first post, I was getting ready for transport from Salisbury to the Trauma Center at Wake Forest Baptist Medical Center with a fractured C-2 vertebra.  As I was loaded in the ambulance, two nurses who would accompany me introduced themselves.  Angels in disguise, they took care of me spiritually as well as physically.  Riding on a backboard with a broken neck in the back of an ambulance is intimidating in itself; but to make matters worse, there were tornado warnings and heavy winds brewing.  The driver kept commenting to the nurses that the winds were making it more difficult to drive.  The nurses, on the other hand, calmly explained what was happening and would happen upon arrival at the ER.

Nearing the hospital, one of the nurses commented that despite the heavy winds and the rush hour traffic, we had made record time.  I felt like Moses must have felt when the Lord parted the Red Sea!  When the doors swung open and I was prepared to leave the vehicle, one of the “angels” commented, “I will pray for you—and I mean it!”  What a blessing!

As I was wheeled into the Emergency Room, I was greeted by a parade of doctors and nurses.  Lying on my back with no way to see anything but the ceiling, faceless voices came and went.  One of those faceless voices announced that I was headed for a CT scan.  Visions of a previous MRI flooded my mind, for I am claustrophobic and at that time I had been unable to undergo the scan because of my fear.

The Lord and I began to discuss this dilemma, and He reminded me of a very recent conversation I had had with my sister-in-law, Gail, who had told me the only way she got through an MRI was by singing hymns and quoting scriptures to herself.   Thus began a silent time of personal worship, praise, and thanksgiving as I closed my eyes and went through what seemed like an eternity in a coffin. Psalm 23:4 came to mind:  “Even when I walk through the darkest valley,^[a]I will not be afraid, for you are close beside me.”   I peeped through one eye for one brief second and saw that someone had put an image of flowers on the ceiling of the “casket.”  How appropriate, I thought!

My silent singing and praying intensified.  “Jesus Paid It All” and “Jesus Loves Me”  come to my remembrance.  What reassurance!  My Abba—my Daddy–was there.   An amazing sense of calm came over me.  The Lord had met me in the storms—the real ones and the imagined ones– and calmed them for me.  Just as He calmed the seas for the terrified disciples (Luke 8:23-25), so he had calmed my fears.  He was with me—whatever came my way!

On return to the ER, my pastor Mike Motley and my family had begun to arrive.  One by one they came to encourage me.  How precious each visitor was—and is!  At one point, my daughter-in-law Heather and I were alone in my little “room” which was nothing more than a curtained off area with other patients on either side.  A commotion began—someone was screaming in pain—cursing the doctors—begging for mercy.  Then another voice from somewhere on the other side of me began to scream out in pain as well.  A nurse alerted us that we were on lock-down—that if Heather should leave, she could not come back in and neither could anyone else.  Thank the Lord, she assured me she would stay, for I was truly helpless, strapped down to the bed without even a call bell.    It was in some ways terrifying, but to my surprise I remained calm.  We would later learn that the two “voices” were gunshot victims and their presence—along with several police officers–was the reason for the lock-down.

Over the next few hours, the Trauma doctors consulted with the Spine doctors, and it was finally agreed sometime around midnight that I would go not to ICU but to a regular room!   Son Joe and his wife Heather would spend the night.  Other family would go home to rest up for their turns with Mama.

It was a long night!  More tests.  More X-rays.  A little sleep from 5 a.m. until 7 a.m.  Shift change.  New nurses and CNAs.  The day drifted by—and then Good News!  To everyone’s surprise,  I was going home!  My neck was bound in a cervical collar, the commandment list of “ Do Nots” was passed on to son Jon and his wife Kandee,  and we were homeward bound!

Grim faces and hushed voices greeted me as most of the family awaited our arrival.  Fear was etched on their faces.  A recliner was moved to my bedroom—my new “bed.”    Two dear ones—Stephanie and Kandee–escorted me to it.  I could not walk on my own.  I remember asking them to find my deceased husband Gerald’s walker as I staggered down the hall.  I had often said I could not sleep on my back, but I did—blessed sleep—and in a recliner!

When I slowly awoke the following morning, I managed to stand up and start down the hall toward the kitchen with coffee on my mind!  Son Jeff, my night “nurse,” met me.  “It’s another miracle!”  He exclaimed, excited but concerned that I was walking on my own.  He and Stephanie moved into action preparing coffee and breakfast—taking over MY old job!

Thus, began Day 2 of being home where “reality” slowly set in.  The “Do Not Commandments” would mean a whole new lifestyle for the next three months.  I really was going to “be still,” for I was told not to drive, not to pick up over eight pounds, not to lean over, not to do much of anything except allow others to take care of my needs.   As a “descendant” of Martha in the scriptures (Luke  10:38-42)—a workaholic who thrives on activity–what was I to do?  Again, the still small voice reminded me, “Be still and know that I am God!”  Psalm 46:10 The Lord meant business!  I was to be still, listen, and obey!

He had told Martha that Mary, her sister, had it right.  It was time for me to become more like Mary.  And believe it or not, I was at peace with it!  Jesus had been with me in that ambulance as the winds blew around us.  He had been with me in the ER, the CT machines, the lock-down, the ride home, the night in the recliner—and He would be with me through what lay ahead because He is my Savior, my best Friend, my Provider, my Guide, my Shepherd, my Lord!  He told his disciples in Luke 12:6-7 (NLT), “What is the price of five sparrows—two copper coins? Yet God does not forget a single one of them. ⁷ And the very hairs on your head are all numbered.  So don’t be afraid; you are more valuable to God than a whole flock of sparrows.”  In other words, He loves us!

In reflecting on my experiences with fear, I am reminded of what Paul told Timothy:  “For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.”  (2 Tim. 1:7 NLT)  I am confident, dear friends, that when fear bubbles up in us, it is not from the Lord but from our own flesh or from Satan.  May we not cower in those instances but claim His “power, love, and self-discipline” through the Holy Spirit within us.

Again, thank you for your words of support and encouragement.  If you have had experiences when God helped overcome your fears, I’d love to hear from you!

In the meantime, ‘May the Lord bless you and protect you. May the Lord smile on you and be gracious to you.  May the Lord show you his favor and give you his peace.”   Numbers 6:24-26